Haven't gone blogging for like a decade. Actually, the truth is I haven't stopped and think for long. If you ask me what I'm doing or what I'm going to do, the answer will be 'donno'. What I know is: 1. I'm not going to get married within a short time, say in these six months. 2. I won't go back to teach. 3. I won't make up with my poor sister who hasn't talked to me since we last quarrel in September. Hah! Right now, I'm looking for a job to make a living and try to lead a life as normal as it can be. And meet my mom only occasionally. My plan is to go further studying on a part-time basis. Maybe if I can find one normal job, I would think about wedding coz I do know it well that I can't rely on anyone but myself in this financial downturn. As for my sister, there's no way I can do provided that she's too manipulating... I'm too old to be under control. I don't deny that I don't know what the hell I'm doing still even while I'm not teaching. But at least, right now, I can be honest to myself and everyone that I'm lost like everyone else. My friend said let's take it as a vacation in life. Well, I assume that he's damn right as I could do nothing else but waiting. I'll try applying Master's degree programme this December... I used to think I was unlucky for everytime I needed a job, it's financial turmoil or tsunami...but now I see it as a chance to freeze and see oneself more clearly. I have no doubt about my wit or ability. It's just a chance that doesn't come by itself. An opportunity that you needa fight for with all might. I have taken a rest for like a year or so to find out what I want. Now, I got it! It's time to go for it. Don't, for god's sake, look back! I wish everyone who's about to take the ALE good luck and health! | 
